Today kicks of National Sleep Awareness Week.
Sleep Awareness Week.
That makes me laugh. As mom to a 2.5 year old and a 6 month old, believe me… I am aware of sleep. I’m aware of how much I need it, miss it, love it. All moms can relate… pregnant women too - as soon as you are uncomfortably pregnant, sleep goes out the window in a cruel plot twist; you know that sleep is a rare, magical thing with a newborn, and while it gets better every day you truly understand why sleep deprivation is used as a torture tactic.
Some people talk about those middle of the night feeds like they are a special time to bond between mom and baby… I didn’t feel that way. I just wanted to sleep and felt I could enjoy my baby’s beautiful face much more in the sunlight - bright-eyed and bushy tailed vs. bleary-eyed and pillow creased.
My reaction to sleep deprivation is poor. As in, my poor husband. 3 am is not my finest moment, nor is “any-moment-after-a-night-of-broken-sleep”; the state of our marriage and the amount of sleep we get go hand-in-hand. Are our children trying to break us up? Why do they hate us so much? As soon as the baby started sleeping through the night, the toddler began having nightmares. Our hearts broke for her, but also for ourselves as we returned to a zombie-like state after a brief and glorious period of relief… it felt like we might never sleep again.
We have and will, obviously, but when you’re deep in the trenches of sleep deprivation, it can feel like nothing else matters. So “Sleep Awareness Week”? Hilarious. Believe me…. I’m aware.